Singularly Unamused
by IDrinkLotsaEarlGrey
Summary: "Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned." And Alice is feeling pretty scorned right about now. (T for language. May have tiny ShuRisu... if you reaaally squint.)
1. Chapter 1

** Chapter One  
****Damn Right She's Back**

**At this point I really don't think a disclaimer is necessary. **

_(This title could also refer to me back from my hiaaaaaaaaatus!)_

* * *

And the Bakugan cast of Mechtanium Surge watched in reverence as Dan sailed into the distant horizon. As he waved and shouted one last farewell that was lost in the wind, a huge sense of contentment washed over all who were watching. One of his crazy, spontaneous ideas, but somehow, they knew he would be fine. His leaving in search of adventure marked the end of their journey together, of adventure, of danger, of thrilling escapades, of friendship. Suddenly, the party set up around them seemed trivial and frivolous in the face of such a wonderful moment, one that everyone was savouring.

Runo shook her head, a small smile gracing her features. "Oh Dan," she murmured softly, "You didn't bring any food with you." Shun, standing somewhere in her vicinity, allowed a low chuckle to escape his lips. Julie caught none of this short exchange as she jumped and bounced and waved and screamed goodbyes at Dan's back.

Sighing in amusement, Runo slowly lifted her gaze to have one last fleeting glimpse of Dan. Something didn't look right. She rose onto her toes and raised a hand over her eyes, shielding them from the Sun, she leaned out as far as she could and squinted at Dan's retreating figure. No, that definitely didn't look right.

Dropping her feet back onto the ground, she glanced at all her friends. All of them seemed as stunned as she probably looked. Stifling a laugh at Shun's open-mouthed expression, she tore her gaze back to the open sea.

...

...

...

"TWO SEASONS WITHOUT ME AND YOU THINK I HADN'T NOTICED! SCREW YOU ALL!" cried a familiar voice, rippling over the expanse of sparkling blue water.

Sitting on the overturned boat, laughing at a spluttering Dan, soaking curls hanging limp around her mirthful face, she raised her twinkling russet eyes to meet Runo's confused green ones.

It was Alice.

* * *

**_Sooooo Alice gets OOC! You would too if you were left out from the better part of three seasons. As you can probably tell this is a parody/humour fic. You'll see what happens in the next chapter... I recommend you research on the time-turner. ;)_**

-Love, Cora


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two**  
**Muggles**

* * *

"C'mon, Dan," giggled Alice, reaching out to grab his arm, neatly trimmed nails digging into his flesh. She rummaged through her pockets and pulled out a sleek silver card, glistening with water droplets. A bright flash of light and Alice had materialised a few feet away from Runo; Dan, Drago, boat and all.

Dan sprang to his feet, a shocked and scared expression on his face. "Runo!" he wailed, rushing towards her, "I could have drowned!" Runo hugged him as he started sobbing into her shoulder.

"I'll never let go Jack, I'll never let go." *

Alice laughed merrily and turned to smile sweetly at the rest, gathering her dripping hair into a bunch and wringing the water out. Marucho coughed awkwardly, which he quickly disguised as nervous laughter. "Er... Alice! It's been a while..."

"A while," she cocked her head to the side thoughtfully, "A while is an understatement." She gave Marucho a bitter little smile.

Everyone shifted uncomfortably, shooting glances at each other.

Shun cleared his throat. "So."

"So." Alice repeated, dangerously soft, "So!" A little louder this time.

"In the time that I was... Conveniently absent... It appears Drago has evolved another few billion times, you have saved the universe multiple times, fangirls are shipping Shun with someone else-" and here her lip curled up in a sneer, "-and you managed to get my bakugan destroyed! Isn't convenient that you just use me whenever you want to travel to Vestroia? Because I'm soooo nice that you can leave me out and I'll still willingly help out!"

_Meanwhile at TMS Entertainment..._

_Bakugan's producer was conducting a meeting. "Ho'kay guys," he beamed widely at his submissive minio- that is to say, subordinates, "We have no use for Alice so let us not feature her in the episode because we can just upgrade Drago to epicness level one million and he can open gateways to dimensions himself! And if we ever need her Alice will be more than willing because she's totally helpless and naive. Hahahaha!"_

"...totally, like, not helpless and naïve!" Julie finished, nodding her head up and down in earnest, bouncing on the balls of her feet.

Alice threw her head back irascibly. "Oh really?" she challenged, folding her her arms testily across her chest, "Why don't we go back in time and see just how things would be different if I was there?" She broke eye contact with them and muttered something under her breath, something that sounded suspiciously like, "Sodding Neathian royalty."

Julie let out a high-pitched shriek of laughter as she doubled over. "Oh, Alice, you're so funny! You know that time travel is impossi..." her jaw dropped and she froze, "...ble...?"

From her pocket, Alice had withdrawn a necklace of sorts. It had a golden chain made of interlocking rings, and suspended on the chain was a curious piece, a ring inside a larger one, with a flat circle that resembled a coin in the centre. She held it up triumphantly as it gleamed and shone in the sunlight. "Time-turner."** she said softly, in a voice full of distinct pride.

"...what?" The words left Runo before she could even stop to think. This provoked an exasperated sigh from Alice.

She rolled her eyes.

"Muggles."

* * *

*_See __**The Titanic**_  
** _See __**Harry Potter**_

_**I don't own those either.**_


End file.
